Eloi Cole - a young adult male dressed in strange plaid clothing with florescent bow tie and was arrested at the large Hadron Collider / CERN.  - April 1 2010

He says he was from the future and had traveled back in time to prevent the LHC from destroying the world.

[Note: Maybe just a bit too much watching Dr WHO and drinking Mountain Dew for this guy.]


The LHC successfully collided particles at record force earlier this week (April 2010), a milestone Mr Eloi Cole was attempting to disrupt by stopping supplies of Mountain Dew to the experiment's vending machines. He also claimed responsibility for the infamous baguette sabotage in November last year.

Mr Cole was seized by Swiss police after CERN security guards spotted him rooting around in bins. He explained that he was looking for fuel for his 'time machine power unit', a device that resembled a kitchen blender.

Police said Mr Cole, who was wearing a bow tie and rather too much tweed for his age, would not reveal his country of origin. "Countries do not exist where I am from. The discovery of the Higgs boson led to limitless power, the elimination of poverty and Kit-Kats for everyone. It is a communist chocolate hellhole and I'm here to stop it ever happening."

This isn't the first time time-travel has been blamed for mishaps at the LHC. Last year, the Japanese physicist Masao Ninomiya and Danish string-theory pioneer Holger Bech Nielsen put forward the hypothesis that the Higgs boson was so "abhorrent" that it somehow caused a ripple in time that prevented its own discovery.

Mr Cole was taken to a secure mental health facility in Geneva but later disappeared from his cell. Police are baffled.


April 12 2010 - The Daily Galaxy

The provided a much more detailed report of what the writer believes to be an April 1st Joke.

Read - "Man from the Future"


Basic Information on CERN Collider:


CERN and Time Travel: